I won’t be there for you anymore – Poetry Challenge

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I won’t be there for you anymore

I’ve sworn never to be one of those pathetic guys who break down because of a girl’s rejection. I also swore never to allow myself fall so hard for someone to the point of forgetting myself and what I mean to the world.

To myself I have promised never to give someone a second chance because I believed that if someone let you down once, they will do it over and over again.

Now here I am

I’m a boy who gave you too many second chances, fell for you so hard that I forgot about myself, I only saw you and nothing more than you.

Because of you, I turned out to be one of those boys I swore never to be like. Those boys that give themselves to girls and then end up getting broken by that same girl.

Now I don’t recognize myself anymore, although the person staring back at me from the mirror looks like me, yet I don’t recognize him.

I can’t recognize the lines around his eyes, the look in his eyes and from what I’m seeing, he’s missing something, perhaps a smile? Yeah I used to smile a lot but not anymore.

This boy gave you all of himself and now I can’t recognize him anymore. You know he gave you more than twice you deserved but you never deserved any of it, the love, trust and the efforts.

But you remember your own words about everything having an expiration date? Well, now does my blindness and this love that was only one sided.

I won’t be there for you anymore

You’ve got no more chances. Not after you had fair amount of those and you threw them all away.

Instead of listening to my head the very first time you played me, I listened to my heart. I should have walked away the first time but rather, I gave you more tools to pull me down.

But now I’m done letting you to use me, I’m done being there for you even though I knew you weren’t willing to be there for me when I needed you. I’m done on neglecting myself just so I can make you happy.

You’ll never get to mess with my life anymore. Now I’m going to have to stand for whatever decision I will take about life without you swooping you to shake me off with all your fake promises about how this time things were different and how you needed me and asnaive as I was, I would end up leaving everything for you.

I have seen you for who you are and you’re not half the person I thought you were. But that’s okay. You can continue being just half of that to someone else now. Because I’m done settling for all your less.

The truth is I do deserve more than you ever gave me and you’ll ever be ready to give to any other boy in your life.

I deserve someone who’ll love me for who I am and I deserve someone who won’t leave me alone in the battles of our relationship, who won’t make me cry myself to sleep every night and who’ll worry about letting me down and someone who sees me as worthy.

I won’t be there for you anymore

You may not notice me gone but you will notice you’re missing something. You’ll miss the person who made you feel good even when you weren’t good. And I promise you, even my shadow won’t be there anymore.

My hardest battles of life are those between what my heart wants and what my mind knows to be true. I’ve chosen my side in this war and I’m going all out for it.

This is first promise I actually have every intention of keeping

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